Times are tough in 2014, men are blaming women, women are blaming men, and dating, which is supposed to be a culture of love, has morphed into a culture of gender war. It’s hard out there for everyone.
The manosphere is rightfully taking off, blogs are popping up left and right, and “red pill women” are becoming an ever increasing presence on the internet. Good for them, I can respect anyone who takes a path of self improvement, and self improvement has always been at the core of “the red pill” or the manosphere, or whatever the hell people are calling themselves these days 🙂
I have only done one “dating advice for women” tip, and its something that I have always truly believed, and now, almost 2 entire years later, I will hit you with another one. You ready for this?
One word, many possible meanings. Effort. Just put in a tiny bit of effort and you are already miles ahead of other women. I guarantee it.
What exactly do I mean by effort? Consider the following story, which happened to me about two weeks ago:
Some friends of mine in Jersey were having a get together. I love those parties – they usually involve smoking, drinking, gaming, catching up with friends, and all done in pure excess. It has always been a blast. Usually, I would ask one of my local friends to pick me up from the train station and give me a ride to the party. It’s one of those “too long to walk but very short in a car” distances. Plus, like just about every area in the US outside a major city – sidewalks didn’t really exist there.
However this time, I decided to meet an old flame for lunch. She’s from Jersey, a few towns over from where the party was held. Now this wasn’t a date, there were no sexual intentions, I just wanted to see what this girl was up to, catch up, trade some stories, etc. Normal stuff. So, instead of having one of my friends pick me up at the train station, I asked her to take care of it, and she happily obliged.
Now this is where things take an unexpected turn. I texted her, letting her know that I was going to board the 1:14 train out of Penn Station and was scheduled to arrive around 1:55. Plans were in place. And then, while I was still in Penn Station waiting for the gate assignment, my cell phone unexpectedly died (no prior low battery warning or anything, I was in the “green” for battery life). Now, I usually charge my phone at my home or office computers, partially because I lost the AC adapter to my charger, so I only had the USB iphone connector in my bag. There were no charger stations anywhere, I could not recall this girls number off the top of my head, or my friends number for that matter. I was on my way to Jersey with a dead Iphone.
“No problem”, I thought to myself. I had given this girl my estimated arrival time, and there is a prominent waiting area at that station where cars scoop up people that have just arrived. There were no other arrival areas.
All this girl had to do was to realize that my phone probably died, but I told her when I should be arriving, and to meet me at the one place where she could. Easy stuff, right?
You can guess what happened.
First, another wrench was thrown into my plans, the train was taking its sweet time because of the snowy mess mother nature made everywhere earlier that week. I stepped off the train at 2:10 pm and walked over to the waiting area.
And to my surprise, I see this girl waving at me from a car!!!
Syyyyyke, it was actually someone who looked similar, waving to a group of people walking behind me. I was almost pleasantly surprised. I walked around the waiting area, looking, waiting, nothing. Soon enough, I was the last guy waiting at the waiting area. To be honest, due to this girls history of lateness, I didn’t know if she arrived on time then left, or she hasn’t arrived at all.
All she had to do was to realize that my phone probably died and the trains are probably delayed. All she had to do was to hang out in that parking lot for a little bit, literally sit on her ass for a little bit longer. All she had to do was put in the tiniest bit of EFFORT, and she couldn’t do that.
And once again, I reacted the same way I always react – with anger, passion, and furor! Just kidding. This was me:
I’ve come to expect shitty behavior and lack of effort from girls, so, sadly, this was nothing new. Think about it. How much shitty female behavior have we witnessed as individuals? What is more surprising and rare at this point – shitty behavior or awesome behavior? And not just in the dating world either. I have an older step sister, and over the weekend, we hit up the Devils game since I had a ticket hookup. Of course she was late, of course it was an excuse-du-jour, and of course I was not the tinyest bit surprised by this. In fact I’m more surprised when she’s exactly on time, a rare feat for her.
Funny coincidence – almost all the girls I went out with were late on the first date. The ones that weren’t – I always ended up dating for a while. Funny coincidence indeed.
This universally lowered bar for women was touched upon by a recent popular cracked article by a woman attempting to create the worst online dating profile ever. She chose to chastise men for being thirsty (which they are), but as Alpha Gameplan points out – it’s nothing special, because lets face it, we are used to hot girls being mean, spoiled, manipulative, ignorant gold diggers. It’s nothing new. That behavior is just part of the game now (by the way, read over both posts when you have time, it’s fantastic).
Ladies, take note, the bar is set INCREDIBLY low for you, so by clearing it, even a little bit, you are putting yourself WAY above the competition. Do the little things – arrive on time, dress up just a tiny bit, reply to texts right away, remember the things he likes. My ex was an expert on this. One day she brought me over some green apples, cornichons and Pepsi max (all my favorite), I wanted to kiss her a thousand times over, i was so ecstatic over something so little. Another time she bought a New Jersey Devils shot glass. Then ninja bobbleheads. She was good. That was part of the reason the breakup was so difficult.
You can do this, because this, unlike most other dating advice, goes both ways. Aren’t girls always complaining that guys don’t do the little things? Aren’t you already projecting the same stuff on a date that you are looking for (girls who are looking for guys with good jobs always seem to brag about theirs, etc)? This one is easy, ladies.
So the next time you’re out with a guy, find out if he likes cheesy action movies (he most likely will), and before the second date, hit up the 5 dollar DVD bin at your local store and get him one. His eyes will light up, and he will be yours.
Plus another person will witness the awesomeness that is Chill Factor. And that will make the world a better place
I hear you, bro. My ex used to be late when we would arrange to meet up somewhere. Always. After a while, I got sick of it and one time I told her ‘If you haven’t turned up within five minutes of the arranged time, I’m leaving’. Lo and behold, she didn’t turn up on time and I left. I received a rather interesting phone call when I got home (I don’t carry my mobile around with me very often by choice). I stuck to my guns and told her I gave her fair warning.
Well, guess what. After that, she was *never* late.
So now I maintain that policy with anyone (male or female) that I have arranged to meet with. No second chances, no excuses. You learn pretty quickly who respects you enough to make the effort to be on time and who doesn’t. Sure, there are times when the situation is out of one’s control (like your example), but frankly, those are the exception not the rule.
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