You catch more flies with honey

I’ve always more or less considered myself an “intentional rebel”. I hated the status quo, always made it a point to dislike stuff that was mainstream, you know the drill. I still try to discover as many “non mainstream” things as I can, learn as much as I can, and try to view the world from as many perspectives as possible. In college i started, like all “know it all” college students, to discover my political side. And in the very much “Red State” of Georgia, especially during the George W. Bush years, it made perfect sense for me to embrace my liberal side. Everyone that disagreed with me was a war mongering, bible thumping, black and female hating bigot. I kind of liked that role. Yeah, I was one of those guys we all make fun of now. But everyone had a bad period, so don’t judge me too hard 🙂

My perspective, however soon changed and broadened. And what was the reason behind it? Tasty lasagna.


pic related

A friend of mine told me about “Lasagna Club” on campus – a volunteer comes to the lounge areas of several dorms after all the dining halls were already closed and serves up delicious lasagna to hungry students. For 5 dollars you could fill up your plate with as much lasagna as you want and feel that sweet sweet carb satisfaction many of us deny ourselves today. Didn’t have 5 dollars? It’s fine, pay what you can. Didn’t have any money at all? You know what, it’s cool, enjoy the food. The mysterious volunteer was friendly, cheerful, and added a certain something to the college experience.

Noone really knew anything about the volunteer however, until one day, after all the lasagna has been served and my friends were hitting the books, I saw some fliers for a church. The following few nights – same thing, random church fliers left by where the plates were, however this man didn’t say a word about his religion, his beliefs or his motivation – he was just there to feed some students.

It was at this point that my ideas started to change. This was a person who I would have probably mocked because of my attitude, and when I realized that he was just doing some good deeds, I felt like an absolute heel. This man, with his quiet dignity and service, was doing more to spread his cause than I was doing by mocking the extremists who tried to do the same. Yeah, we focus on the loud obnoxious assholes because they are loud and obnoxious, but outside of them there is an entire world of beliefs and actions that could actually lead to a better life. It’s hard to argue that life wouldn’t be better if we became a little more “good Christian” (by that i mean the actual over-arching ideas of love and compassion, thats about as much as my religion talk goes, but hey, Dalrock exists).

Think about it this way – why did the anti religion people hate Tim Tebow so much? Because he did not sling venom or hate, instead he had an exemplary community service record and spread his love of Jesus through service.  He rehabilitated prisoners for fun. It’s tough to not like a guy like that.


And even he couldn’t save everybody

Recently I have noticed an interesting development in the ongoing saga of the Manosphere – peace and love. Now we are all familiar with the “angry” side of the manosphere (and if you haven’t read M3’s excellent piece on the topic – do it now). We are all familiar with the “foaming at the mouth with rage” “feminists” that oppose it (one of them even made ED – good for her). We all know that both sides think they are right and downplay (or simply refuse to acknowledge) the angry masses on their side. We are the good guys. They are the bad guys. That’s just how life is. And we all end up looking like children in the process.

But then there was a glitch in the Matrix. Enter Amanda Palmer


Yep, the same Amanda Palmer behind the Dresden Dolls, a band that the Jezebel crowd absolutely touches themselves over. I won’t go over her history, or the controversies she has been a part of. I will however point you to her tumblr page – where, in the wake over the infamous ROK article “5 Reasons to Date a Woman with an eating disorder” and all the negative attention it received, she seems to have risen up as a voice of reason.

Check out the full exchange here. It’s worth it. 

they should not be shot. nor castrated. think about it. they should be smothered in fucking love and compassion. possibly the only way they’ll ever snap out of it. $50 says if you castrate/shoot them they’re bound to just build a nastier website. don’t perpetuate the cycle. rise.

yes. we can and should be angry. this website is mad cray.

but saying “THESE MEN SHOULD DIE SLOW DEATHS/BE CASTRATED/MUTILATED” and those responding “FUCK YEAH” is stooping right down to level of mindless violence and non-respect that this website is perpetuating. and it’s exactly the response that gives forward-thinking feminists a bad rap in as a bunch of maniacal “man haters”.  so yes. feel anger. share feelings. respond with truth. but don’t use wrong speech, or get violent. or say anything you wouldn’t say in the actual company of these human beings. it still amazes me that some women think the correct response to this is “LET’S KILL THESE PEOPLE.” really, ladies? would you call up the mother of the guy who started this website and say “hello, ms. smith, i think your son should be castrated and die.” ??? no. really. honestly. you wouldn’t. you’d be angry, but human. so let’s please get our shit together and treat each other – yes, even the people like this – with dignity and respect.  golden fucking rule, people. otherwise we all stay in the fucking gutter. rant over.

Click on the link above. Look at how some people are responding to her call of peace, love and respect.People would rather continue the cycle of anger than to find a solution. Amanda Palmer gets it. Much love.

It doesn’t seem like her message of peace and acceptance has spread very far amongst other feminists. I’m sure by now we have all seen the angry feminist mob attacking an Argentinian cathedral.

Other sites have already covered this topic to death, but let’s focus on something particular shall we? The men protecting the cathedral are not responding with anger or rage. They are displaying the patience of a saint. They do not allow themselves to be cast as the bad guy… and therefore they win. It is very hard to sympathize with the feminists in this video, no matter how pro choice you claim to be.

“Never argue with an idiot. They will only bring you down to their level and beat you with experience.” George Carlin.

Need another example of “bad guys” doing good? Let’s look at one of the favorite targets of “feminists” – professional pickup artists.

Here’s some background on our next clip. The guys at Simple Pickup make some entertaining videos. Some of their videos have some pretty wacky over the top hijinks meant not only to entertain, but to teach the audience that picking up girls can be… simple. Deciding to blend their videos with some good deeds, they managed to raise 7000 dollars for a breast cancer charity by donating $20 for each girl that let them motorboat her.  That is a rather impressive amount of motor boating.

However, in come the radical “feminists” to make things fun. They force the breast cancer charity to refuse their donation. And then… magic happens.

Once again, the “feminists” are made to look like uncaring savages and the Simple Pickup guys – through their charity and good deeds, become the good guys. Yes, “misogynist” pickup artists can be good guys.

So invite you, my dear reader, to make a commitment with me. Let’s all be good guys. Let’s try to spread as much care and joy to other people as we can. Let’s be good positive human beings. Because it is through THIS goodness that our message can spread and become more accepted. It is through this goodness that our message, our stories, our lessons, will have a new audience. It is through this goodness that we help our fellow man.

On every single site and forum i keep hearing the same chatter – how can i show this stuff to my friend? How can I make him see the light? How can this person that I care about lead a better life through some of my own beliefs? Many people recommend that “red pill” ideals should not be shared with anyone until they discover them on their own. I say share it. Just be a good messenger and lead by example.

And leave the vinegar at home

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12 Responses to You catch more flies with honey

  1. Jeremy says:

    The red pill is vinegar. The red pill is the bitter truth. Until you realize that you’ve only been fed sugary lies your whole life, you’re not ready to see it. The sweet and bitter of life are only appreciated when you get equal measures of both. I’m not going to pretend that your basic premise is wrong. No, absolutely, you do catch more flies with honey. But there’s no sugar-coating reality. Ultimately the red pill is full of painful truth, but at least it’s truth.

    There’s a difference between being a door-to-door red pill salesman, who brings bitter reality to everyone even if they don’t want to hear it; and a red-pill monk who lives that life and always seems to have all the answers.

    I have red-pill friends who don’t even know they’re red-pill, they’re just that way because their parents raised them that way. Their lives are generally going well and I know for a fact that people who know them from afar probably stand in awe of them and want to know how they’re able to accomplish so much of what they want. Unfortunately, those friends are mostly clueless on the differences between them and regular blue-pillers, so they can’t offer anything… but that’s where I come in, that’s where people who have read up on the dark enlightenment can be of great service.

    • I like the salesman vs monk analogy. I guess I want to fancy myself as a monk. One day, out of the blue, a guy i haven’t talked to in ages called me up and said “Hey man… me and my wife are separating. I know i have to go out there and meet some new people and take my mind off things, I don’t know how, and I know you do.” similar situations tend to happen more and more often

      • Jeremy says:

        Exactly, that’s what you mean to say, find the situations where people are confused and angry about how life’s treated them, and then explain to them what you think of how life really works.

  2. Pingback: Feeding Someone the Pill | The Red Pill Journal

  3. Gojira says:

    NIce, but this kindness you speak must be in the actions, not integrated into our percepction, the real lesson here i think is to communicate better, cut the crap about love and shit, self respect come first, we should all aim to more win/win interactions, but your advice leaves out the facts that most people are emotional vampires, you do not deal with love with neurotic people,not even condescending

    • Yeah, the emotional vampires are out there, but there is one sure fire way of dealing with them. Think about it this way – if a tree falls in the woods and noone is around to hear it – does it make a sound? Of course it does!
      Well if a good deed is done, and noone is around to praise you, is a good deed still done? Of course it is. We always expect a return on our investment, thats how we were raised. I’ve stopped thinking that way about a lot of things and I just do them for the sake of doing them, because they make me feel good.

      There are some downsides to this type of attitude for sure. I remember the last time a girl flaked HARD on me – I was completely unphased, as if expecting this kind of behavior. And that made me mad – not that the girl flaked, but that i didn’t give a shit that the girl flaked, as if expecting general human courtesy has become an antiquated value.

  4. Meditation Lady says:

    “A friend of mine told me about “Lasagna Club” on campus – a volunteer comes to the lounge areas of several dorms after all the dining halls were already closed and serves up delicious lasagna to hungry students. For 5 dollars you could fill up your plate with as much lasagna as you want and feel that sweet sweet carb satisfaction many of us deny ourselves today. Didn’t have 5 dollars? It’s fine, pay what you can. Didn’t have any money at all? You know what, it’s cool, enjoy the food. The mysterious volunteer was friendly, cheerful, and added a certain something to the college experience.”

    My campus had the Hare Krishnas feeding us for free with their Food For Life program. Delicious east-west fusion style Indian food with beautiful Sanskrit chanting going on in the background. Love those guys and gals!

  5. Sploosh says:

    Damn son. Solid fucking post. I’ve been planning on redoing my site design for 2014 and rolling out 100% positive posts for next year. I absolutley agree with you. It’s time for us to quit giving the femnazi’s fuel for the fire and showing them to be the crazies that they are. Time to kill them with kindness.

  6. Meditation Lady says:

    Its too bad the Manosphere is filled with a constant stream of hate rhetoric. It really gives the Mens Rights Movement a bad name, though I know MRM is not officially linked with the online Manosphere, still Manospherians are calling themselves MRAs.

    If they would have focused on the positive and been a force for good from the get-go, they may have garnered more support by now.

  7. Pingback: You Catch More Flies with Honey

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