Dating Tip for Women – The phrase you should avoid if you want to be more than a pump and dump

“He said he’d call”.

“Everything was going so well”.

“He just disappeared”..

This happens ladies, and let me tell you why. Most men who talk to you, no matter who they are and when it is, have two intentions:

1. They want to have sex with you and are attracted to you physically. 

2. They would like to know more about you as a person and might see you as a potential long term partner.

The 2nd happens almost all the time. Many guys are secretly romantic saps waiting on the right girl. However – if a girl fails part 2 – part 1 still remains, we would still like to have sex with you. It’s in our nature. You might not notice the subtle things a guy does to test for the 2nd thing, but it’s there.

For me, there is one seemingly innocent phrase that alters my perception of you completely. Not in it’s context, but in it’s timing, because if you say this at the wrong time, you are completely disqualified from being “girlfriend material”. What’s this phrase?

wait for it.

wait for it.

And what do you do?

Yes, that seemingly innocent phrase has led to more confused women than math and science. And it’s not a bad phrase in itself, after all its important to know what your potential partner spends a lot of their time doing. But timing is king here. And if you say this magic phrase before you find out a guys name, or immediately after, he will likely think that you’re one of “those girls”: spoiled, likes gifts, career obsessed, and will probably leave when times are hard.  I can go on.

I thought I was just being over dramatic with this idea, so I decided to to ignore my advice once, and when a girl asked me what I did immediately after finding out my name, I obliged. Bad idea (wrote about her in this post), and after several rounds of great, but not “connected” sex, we stopped seeing each other. It had no potential. She’d rather sit in a board room than look at the beautiful night sky.

So ladies – if you want to know what a guy does, just wait and he’ll probably tell you. Or at least ask waaaay after finding out his name.

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3 Responses to Dating Tip for Women – The phrase you should avoid if you want to be more than a pump and dump

  1. lushfun says:

    Online dating culture furthers this trend of “what do you do?” with the full disclosure aspect of characteristics etc, you could fill in bs which is what I do but there seems a progression of it is ok for me to lie but you must be honest which is odd. The proclivity to spin more and more lies to create a character simply for the sake of getting something you think you want becomes more and more pronounced. Eventually things get so convoluted there is a symptom of virtual overload yet literal starvation of choice. Ergo the girls seem to think they have everything they want until the virtual reality glasses come off and then whiff of reality sends the rationalization pinball going.

  2. Pingback: Linkage is Good for You: Week of February 19, 2012

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