During my last little match.com search session (shortly after I posted my last post), I was browsing through profiles of girls that were currently logged on, laughing at the fact that only big girls, or girls that have yet to figure out how to turn off their on site instant messaging had the “IM Me now” feature ready.
But then I noticed a girl there that I’ve previously messaged, but have yet to get a reply from. Her profile was amazing – she was young, had several bikini pictures handy to prove she’s not a secret fatty, said she liked cooking, she was “old school” in her dating ways, spoke 3 languages and even had a poem in there . She was about as un-generic as you can get, and at least in her base profile form – my type of girl. so I IM-ed her, not expecting anything in return (im pretty sure that I have NEVER gotten an IM reply on that web site), but not wanting to give up either.
Before you know it we start talking. Before you know it – we’re on the phone. And before you know it, she’s sitting next to me grabbing drinks the next evening.
That’s when you know you’re out on a date with a beautiful girl – you eyes are fixed, not wandering. The only thing your eyes see is how other guys there are trying way harder with girls that are so….. inferior. We talked, she was getting more impressive with every single thing she said. From her beliefs about life, family, etc, it was clear that this girl was becoming more attractive with every passing second. I rarely say this, but I was smitten.
But then, a few drinks in, it became clear. I wasn’t myself. I wasn’t my normally uber confidant, quick witted attractive self. My abundance mentality, my usual thought that almost every girl can be replaced, which gave me exactly what I needed to talk openly and confidently – was gone. I knew this girl was rare, and I was completely off my game. And it showed. It showed bad. It will be a damn miracle if me and this girl hang out again.
So What have we learned? A Perfect 10 is the ideal combination of looks and personality (and yes, in this one, personality is extremely important, just as important as looks). Looking back at 2 earlier relationships I had this year – one was an all around awesome cute nerdy chick (but she wasn’t that great looking, that “spark”, as corny as it sounds, was never there, and when I was out with her, as interesting as she was – I always looked elsewhere), the other – a beautiful blond perfect bodied dance team coach that couldn’t hold a conversation if her life depended on it and our dates bored me to tears.
But what do you do in this case? Nowadays, every single time I go out (heck, even during my mid day activities), I see less and less beautiful women every day. Bars are quickly turning into epic sausagefests. On most days I can only spot a beautiful woman in passing, across the street, ironically out of reach. .
So what to do?
What I’ve always done – turn things around! From today on a night out will not involve a shitty female less bar! I will not hit on a girl that is less than beautiful (unless of course there are no other options and I am plenty drunk). I will add variety to my venues and activities. I will deal with the bullshit of the New York club scene, knowing full well the rewards. I will meet pretty girls after pretty girls, so that these rare gems won’t be so rare and I’ll be back to my awesome self.
I will do this because I know the alternatives. And I don’t like the alternatives. I will do this because even though NYC has more women than men, your average night out can best be described by this brilliant sex and the City spoof – Sixes and the City:
And I will do this because In the worst case scenario – with the obesity rate skyrocketing to the point where fat is the new normal – this is what happens, and I don’t know about you – I find it terrifying: